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Living in the Grey

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I live and work in the grey.  Not fully hearing. Not fully Deaf. Not neatly defined by the boxes we tend to know and rely on.  I have a moderate to severe hearing loss in both ears and wear hearing aids. Some days, I function well. Other days - when I’m tired, overwhelmed, or even just have a cold (as I do this week - bleurgh ) my access to sound drops significantly. Conversations blur. I rely more heavily on lipreading, context, visual cues, and when all else fails - tuning out and phaffing about.  It shifts and I shift.  And that’s the part we don’t talk about enough.  In the world I work in, “Deaf” is often clear. It’s a cultural identity. A language. A community. It’s visible, respected, and increasingly understood.  “Hearing” is also clear.  But the grey space in between? That space can feel invisible.  And yet, it’s full of people.  People like me who move between worlds. Who sometimes access spoken language and sometimes don’t. Who ar...
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Who the hell are you and why are you here, dammit?

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Hey there. Greetings.  Years ago, I had a little blog called Cut My Milk. It was fun. I loved doing it. I had a voice of some kind.  While I hung around home doing fuck-all except raise my five weird spawn, cooking for them, cleaning for them, entertaining them, blah, blah, blah, I wrote shit down. But that was then and this is now and I can't keep living in the past. I've moved on. I now work two jobs, continue to raise my five weird spawn, cook for them, clean for them, pay for their entertainment and petrol. See. Progress. Who am I? I've been called many things in my life, some I won't share here, but most recently Mam, Mum, Mim, Mummacita, Sweetie, and Mrs Mac. My other labels include: AuDHD (the inattentively fabulous type), PTSDish, depressed, anxious, fibromyalgic, overtalkative, overweight, overtired, sweary, mouthy, annoying, embarrassing, procrastinator, deaf, mediocre parent, pretty cool teacher, and good enough. I wear my Good Enough badge with great honor a...
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